Zombification

New diseases are generally investigated using experiments
on infected people, clinical trials or medical observation.
Unfortunately, because of the rapid zombification of scientists,
epidemiologists and doctors, society was left with only
one group of technocrats who remained uninfected: mathematicians.
Fortunately, during the time at which the outbreak
occurred, members of this group had not been invited to parties
and thus remained entirely uninfected.
A mathematical model for zombie infection was quickly
designed (Figure 1). As shown by the model, humans could
be infected by contact with a zombie, whereas zombies could
be created either through the conversion of humans or reanimation
of the dead. The model assumed that zombies could
be killed in encounters with humans, as often happened
when humans ran over zombies in their cars. Initially, such
deaths were assumed by authorities to be part of a concerted
effort at eradication of zombies, but were later revealed to be
simply a result of rush hour. Some drivers were surprised
when these recently deceased zombies returned to life and
attacked them. Other drivers simply handed the zombies
some spare change and waited for the reanimated creatures
to clean their windshields.

http://mysite.science.uottawa.ca/rsmith43/CMAJZombies.pdf